At first, I would go out to the cemetary every day, after about a month I'd go out every few days, now I go to see Gabriel about once a week. I'm satisfied with that, I don't feel like I'm dwelling on our loss, I feel like I'm making strong progress in othe greiving process. I enjoy going out and visiting him, I take him little presents, relight the candles my mom has left for him, and have a chance to tell him how much I love and miss him. I realize his spirit isn't there, but the only physical part of him is there. Its comforting to me to be near him, its a reminder of how much he's taught me and how much he's forced me to grow as a human being. Usually, Evelyn stays in the car (its been kinda cold and windy and I don't like to drag her out in it). I went there the other day, for the first time I felt strong and confident instead of weak and emotional. I brought some new decorations and Evelyn brought a red pinwheel for her brother.