"There are two things I learned from him that night. The perfection of a moment, and the fleeting nature of it. "
Went to the cemetary today - as I do so frequently. Last time I was out there was last Wednesday. When I got there I got a bit of a surprise though, his stone was placed!
In any case, its beautiful. I couldn't ask for a better stone. Its exactly how I expected it to be.
It was a bittersweet moment. I was excited that it was there, I've been waiting for it for so long. But at the same time, it was sad - it feels so final. It feels more final than laying him to rest did.
Derrick hasn't seen it yet, I'm taking him there tonight.
Overall, we're doing fairly well. We still have our moments though. I haven't finished his scrapbook yet, I'm still working on it little by little. Derrick has a hard time looking through what I have finished so far. He did look at it and noticed that Gabriel looks a lot like my grandpa's baby picture - which was a little weird for him apparently. We are still attending our support groups every 2 weeks. I don't know how long we'll attend that for, but we enjoy meeting other loss parents.
I'm so thankful for those who have found my via my blog. I enjoy talking to others who know exactly what I'm thinking and feeling.
Thanks for the 'heads up' on it possibly feeling more final than laying Gabriel to rest. Laying Weston to rest felt quite final, for sure; however, I can see how a finished headstone might finalize things even more. Thankfully, thus far, God's strength and peace, the sweet release of tears, and the precious memories with Weston have helped emphasize the 'sweet' part of this journey more so than the 'bitter' part. <3
ReplyDeleteGuy's! I was so shocked to run across your posting, I knew nothing about your tragic loss and seeing this hit me like a rock. I feel so much pain for you and your family. You two kids are very special people and I miss the good times we all had together when I worked at WW's.
ReplyDeleteI sincerely hope that you two are able to handle your loss at this point in your darkness. But ya know guy's, the three of you; belong to God's special club. You Sam, Derrick and your little Angel Gabriel. As little Gabriel plays beneath the feet of God, his connection to his loving parents here on earth will never end and will only grow stronger. God wanted Gabriel home for reasons we will never know but you can bet that the love, light and protection coming your way is because you know an Angel.
God Bless The Both Of You
And Your Family.
JW and Kimberly Wieser