Catching Up

It seems I have some catching up to do. Getting time to blog these days is hard!

Now that it's summer I try to get Evelyn and the boys out and about as much as possible. Walking, parks, and just hanging around outside.  I usually end up typing into a blog on my phone while I'm wondering around, but I never seem to get around to finishing it on the computer so I can add pictures and edit it how I want to.

Build A Bear x2

Last week, my mom and I took the kids out to Build A Bear. The boys needed a bear to match the one we buried with Gabriel, that Evelyn also has.  Its great to know all the kids will have a bear that matches the one Gabriel has with him forever.

The bear is called "Champ".  We didn't realize until this trip in, that Champ has a story all his own.  He is in honor of a little girl who lost her battle to cancer. A donation is made in her honor each time a bear is sold.  What a fitting bear to have chosen for our purpose.

I was sad to hear that the bear would be redesigned in a few weeks. I really like the bear and knowing I can always get one. I suppose it doesn't matter what the design is, as long as it's Champ.

Mother's Day without Gabriel

Still tough.  I wore my Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness ribbon the whole day again this year. I guess that's my way of keeping him with me always. Nobody probably noticed, but I knew it was there and I knew he was with me.

I looked around at all the babies around me, thinking of all the mother's missing a child that day. It sad to see so many out there now, Gabriel is 3 rows back in a sea of babies lost.

Lunch With Gabriel

The first actual summer day - in the 90s today. We went out and had "lunch" with Gabriel, even though my lunch got left at home. My mom, step dad, and the kids joined me. This was the first time the boys were introduced to the cemetery and Gabriel's place. It was bitter sweet. I had been looking forward to having a day when I could take them out there, yet wish this wasn't going to be a part of their life.  Someone once told me it didn't have to be, that I didn't have to take the kids there. I guess they don't understand, I do have to take the kids there. I need the kids to know and to be familiar with their other brother.

This was also the first time I've gone out there on a day when it was nice enough to drag the boys out of the van. It started out at 65 degrees. In the hour we were there it was up to 80 and by the end of the day it was somewhere around 95!

The boys

Sleeping is better. They are now going 4-5 hours each night instead of 2-3.  Makes for a happy momma. They are also spacing out their eating times too, now they eat every 3-4 hours instead of 2-3.  Also makes momma happy. 

They are full of smiles and laughs. They love to watch and observe everything around them.  They love their sister, they laugh and smile at her as they watch her play and be crazy. She loves entertaining her brothers, she gets a big kick out of them.

Our little girl is such a helper, she loves to be around her brothers and help us with them. She is just dying to be able to play with them, she's always trying to pile her toys on them. What can I say, she likes to share.