Everyone knows that when I take the kids out in public, the boys tend to attract a lot of attention. People who are regularly around me are starting to understand why I get annoyed, why I don't always respond cheerfully and with a big smile to strangers. Friends and family members are beginning to comprehend why I sometimes feel like a circus sideshow when I go out in public with the kids. I know in my heart that it's simply because I produce the cutest kids on the planet. But really, people are genuinly curious about twins and seeing them can really make someone's day. After about the 3rd or 4th time I get stopped or talked to I start to get more passive - if that's even the right word. I start to answer "yes" as I'm still walking away. I don't look people in the eye and rarely smile at them (hello, that's just asking for interaction!) I'm going to focus on one thing in this post: "Are they identical?"
The boys really look A LOT alike. Some days I mix them up terribly. Just the other day our friends were over and Karen was on the floor holding one baby and trying to distract the crying one at the same time. I came in and picked up the crying one and immediately started desperatly trying to get him to simmer down. Here's how the scene went:
Me: *insert baby talking voice here* "Hi Sawyer. Sawyer look at momma. Hi baby. Sawyer..."
Karen: "You have Logan"
Me: *looking at both babies desperately trying to figure out who is who. *
Karen" *laughing hysterically*
So yes, I mix them up... At least once a day if not more. There are days I absolutely cannot tell them apart unless I lay them on the floor to judge by size. Logan is now 20.2lbs and Sawyer 18.2lbs. That 2lbs makes a huge difference in their overall size and appearance.
So while I was at Wal-Mart the other day, getting stopped in every aisle, a woman asked me again "are they identical?" My response was the same as it always is "We don't actually know", at which point they give me a funny look like "How do you not know?" Its complicated. Its not as simple as people think. They assume that if they shared a sac/placenta then they are identical (true) and if they had seperate sacs/placentas then they have to be fraternal (not true).
I had considered having them tested but really didn't care enough to shell out $100 to ease our/your curious mind. Whether or not they are identical or fraternal doesn't really matter very much, that is, unless a health issue comes up that would make it crucial information. I'd planned to just wait it out and see if they change and look different as time goes on. I change my plan.
I'm really tired of feeling like a crummy parent when people ask me if they are identical, I don't know... I'm the mom, I should know. How do I not know? Of course then I have to explain the science behind twins and that just because they were Dichorionic/Diamniotic (di/di - in seperate sacs/placentas) doesn't mean they are fraternal....
They look a lot alike, I frequently mix them up as do other people. They have the same blood type (if I remember correctly from when they were born). They have the same hair, eyes, nose, and height suggesting possible identical twinning. But the chance that they are identical as di/di twins is only 23%.
When I got home and searched Google the first links that popped up were for a place called Proactive Genetics located in Georgia. After reading through reviews and various websites, asking around twin mom forums, and getting comfortable with the idea, I finally ordered a kit. They said a couple days to receive it, I ordered on Thursday so hopefully Monday or at least early this week it'll arrive. After I do it I'll overnight it back. They say up to 10 days for processing and then they'll send me the results.
It won't change anything except my answer to that ever-so-popular question: "are they identical? " I'll finally have a solid answer "Yes" or "No". It doesn't matter either way, at least not for now. If they do happen to be identical then that might change our game plan a tiny bit while raising them, to really ensure they remain individuals.
When I look back on the past months I remember being able to tell them apart fairly easily. I almost always knew who was who. Now I look at old photos and I have to wonder how on earth I knew, I can't tell them apart in the photos half the time:
When I look back on the past months I remember being able to tell them apart fairly easily. I almost always knew who was who. Now I look at old photos and I have to wonder how on earth I knew, I can't tell them apart in the photos half the time:
I'm interested to hear what you find out!
ReplyDeleteAmanda Hayes
I can't wait to finally know for sure! I know I'll do an entire blog about the results!
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